Better to desire what you don’t have, than to have what you never desired!

In this age of busy lives, we hardly get time to be cordial to the dynamics beneath our surface static, to listen to our body and mind and somehow if we get it, we often find it complaining. However it always remains there in our subconscious mind that perhaps we want to do something, which is important as well as desirable and we want to divert our attention towards it, but eventually it leads to procrastination as a result of lack in mind-body communication. And life keeps going on juggling with the flotsams of everyday life. And in this process, we tend to do few unintended compromises.

I would like to comment on the way we make our choices and negative subsequent effects of them because of the absence of continuous introspection. It’s true we don’t have control over everything what happens, but we surely do exert a field of influence for having the power of choice. So it becomes important to be aware of these choices and make them consciously based on our understanding and belief. And when it comes to the choices we make in case of relationships, their consequences can really be vital. It actually happens quite often that people sometimes even admit to settling for someone who is not really what they wanted, but they think at least they are not alone or no longer left in solitary isolation. It probably works as an immediate fix, but unfortunately may not last long.

It actually gets defined by the set points of our personality. Our set points always drag us towards what we want, what we really have desire for! So be aware of yourself, reflect upon your choices, and give yourself enough time and space to think about what you really want, instead of grappling with the aftermath of doing things, which you never desired. But again is it possible that you can always get what you want? Obviously not, but at the same time it’s true that in spite of fear of the consequences associated with even a well thought-out choice, particularly of this kind where you can only be confident up to a certain extent, and are surrounded by anticipations of future, you would always find easier to live with this situation than the one which you feel compromised in!  We certainly find ourselves circumscribed by thoughts like “What would be HIS choice! What extent I could be part of it!” even as there is nothing wrong in believing yourself stumble one day upon the one who could fathom your soul! So let your higher self be the ultimate guide and make sure you remain conscious during the course of this journey of discernment and let it meander through the states it desires to, let God help you to decide and believe who the special one is and I really wish you all find your soul-mates some day, if you haven’t found yet! :)

She is no less of a feminist!

At times, we hear it coming, mostly from the types of self proclaimed feminists, “If men can do this and that, why can’t we?” but is this statement really fathomable enough? This is actually one of most unreasonable comment I have ever come across! Most women keep fighting for the idea of equality and unknowingly try to fit themselves in men’s standards, that is sadly exactly opposite to what they are trying to do-asserting the magnitude of being a woman! Aren’t they making mess out of the real value of womanhood as such?

I remember a movie called Astitva, which is a very sensible flick in terms of what Director wants to convey and also in terms of its ability to trigger the thought in viewers’ mind, the definition of feminism!

Simply put, it’s about having the right to act or think whatever is necessary to be progressive as a human being, like a man has! But unfortunately, our society is badly defected by otherwise notions, which always lead a woman to be against a man and even women often perceive it in wrong sense! Family life has been underrated upto such an extent that women tend to think of it as a slavery and they think they are being submissive if they opt to only take care of their family. As we can see in a character Meghna of that movie, she thinks an educated woman cannot be the one who wishes to be a house-wife! Actually the problem is with the notion existing in our so called modern developed society that managing home is the waste of a woman’s talent and she can be considered to be equal to men only when she can do the same thing as a man does. Actually I want to raise this question only, that if a woman chooses to be a housewife, how do we, as a society look upon it?

I think a woman opts to stay at home, just because of the fact that she wants to give her children or family a culturally and emotionally perfect environment, which is sometimes not possible when both man and woman are working and since men are so strongly socialized to be the “providers”, that to see this happening other way round would be quite unacceptable, even to women.

I hope I am not mistaken here. I just want to say that if a woman, by her very own choice wishes to be a house-wife, she deserves immense respect and admiration for this and we should try to change this wrong notion existing in our society that “managing” money is anyway less important than earning money.

Despite all these facts, I strongly advocate this fact that a woman needs not “sacrifice” herself for the sake of family and even when they both are working professionals’ things could be worked out very well, but It surely requires a wonderful understanding between man and woman and of course, it’s possible up to an extent, but surely not for lifetime! A time surely comes when you have to go through these narrow choices and act upon them. So I feel very first thing is that every man must understand this fact what a great responsibility a woman performs while being a house-wife so that it no longer remains like an inferiority. I mean woman must not work just to prove that they are not inferior to man. And then the understanding should get developed how they want to align their professional lives with other priorities. So precisely speaking, it’s not about who is better, who is not! Man and woman are two different creations and they both play very important roles in ensuring the progression of an upright society. So let it be the choice of a woman if she wants to be a housewife. She is the one, responsible for the perpetuation of species. Respect them, admire them and assist them to find equilibrium. Actually I met one Indian family here in Korea. She is a well educated intelligent lady and her confidence in saying, “I know how important I am for my kids”, corroborated this fact exceptionally well!