A trip back home-abode of two beautiful angels of my life-Next phase!

Trip back home is usually a parents-son affair, which is endearing as always, but this time it was even more than that. My elder sister along with my nephew and niece was around, so it was one beautiful feeling to be there, icing on a usually delicious breath-taking cake. Needless to say, I had such a great time and enjoyed it so very much that no part of me was feeling like coming back. Huhh…this transition is always difficult.
One big difference I have experienced over the years is that when you are with your parents, your close ones for whom you are an integral part of their lives and emotional space, everything is found to be falling in place, but when you are away, you make efforts and try to keep everything in place. That’s why I strongly feel that we always live two personalities, one which enjoys spontaneity, always feel like doing crazy things and hopelessly in love with what is happening around and other, which long for being of first kind, but feels responsible about keep creating reasons of happiness to enjoy while living the first kind. In other words, at the very primitive level of emotional health and consciousness where your heart enjoys its fantasy, you feel as if everything is out of place once you are away from those close ones, but soon mind comes into picture to suggest that big part of that happiness is because you are doing fine when you are away and you start coming back to normal and begin to clearly see what is important in the moment. So both personalities are important and they are very intimately connected with each other and help to make you feel collective and composed.
As I said, this transition is difficult, even as it’s always a beautiful information to have that you are hopelessly in love with those beautiful angels and love them beyond your control and every string of your heart knows that they reciprocate it beautifully.

A trip back home-abode of two beautiful angels of my life!

I am just back from home, after spending ten beautiful days with two beautiful angels of my life; two amazing people who have been the source and origin of tunes, the lyrics, and the symphony of every beautiful piece of music that Nature played in my life. Parents are just like that. It’s ineffable to express what they do for their children. Those words never existed and could never be invented! You just feel the eternal bliss of having them in your life. Obviously, the feeling to be with them, to be able to see them around each day when you wake up, is second to none and this feeling is more subtle and palpable when your heart knows, in the last few years it has spent just a countable days with them. 

Since the day I joined college, I haven’t been able to spend much time with them and just visited them during semester breaks when I was in college and now mostly at some of these festival occasions. Of course, I really miss them whenever I am away and I feel there is a different being in me, which lives its life only when I am with these two amazing people; I truly feel as if it resumes from where I left when I was home last time! You just feel so safe and secure; you can be that extra careless; you can show that extra bit of negligence; you feel as if nothing can go wrong with you as long as you are with them. You are not being judged and no matter what you do, you’re going to remain the dearest for them as you always were. Life just blossoms into its most beautiful facets. Being with them, you always find yourself full of strength. Subtle expressions on their faces with serene tranquillity tell you a loud that everything is fine; you are sailing through an ocean of love, just enjoy it. There is so much love and beauty; there is so much of it.

Like any son would do, I love them a lot. I adore them for everything they did for me. But apart from loving them as my parents, I also admire them for being the kind of people they are. I can indefatigably go on writing about their established ways of life. I feel one of the most amazing things Parents do is bringing out the spiritual dimension in a child’s being. The very first seed of spirituality is always sowed by the parents who devote their entire energy in shaping up their children’s life. They influence a child’s psyche in varied ways and making a child realize the importance of being connected to the source is one of them. As you grow up, many a times, it happens that you do something good and get appreciated for it, and suddenly you tend to ask yourself where it has come from, who taught you these things! And there you probably realize that it all flows in genes, their blessings get reflected in your deeds, it’s fruition of their lifelong incessant efforts in letting you learn the values they always wished you imbibe in and then create a niche of your own, keeping those values as soul of living.

It’s so amazing to still see that incessant powerful urge in them to give you more even when they have spent their entire life doing the same. Sometimes I wonder and feel like asking them, ‘what is that which is left in you that you haven’t given me!’ and with more than twenty five years of benevolence over me, still they are always ready to give. So amazingly lovely it is. 

Now since you are going through that phase of life when you have a bunch of experiences with you and formed an approach towards life, Nature tries to teach you new aspects of human manifestation fused with responsibilities and all those pertinent intricacies of it and if you are consciously attending these teachings, you happen to have these very discernible unspoken reverberations and unsaid conversations within, ‘Though they have done so much and introduced innumerable happiness in my life for all these years that I can't just pay them back even a bit. But still I urge YOU to please make me potent enough to know everything what they desire, what they desired when I was unable to lend a supportive hand; which crossed their mind even for a while, but sacrificed it every time while bringing me up because I want to give them that every small happiness! I know they would never tell me; so I ask YOU, the Almighty for strength. God, you have been so kind to me, introducing two extremely beautiful people who were the origin and source of every wonderful thing happened to me, introducing two angels for me even before my existence! Hopefully I could do justice to my life by understanding and doing at least this much!!!’

Parents are the two finest musicians of their children’s life and not wrong to say, they truly specialize in background music! You might be doing great in the central plot and getting all the accolades, and back of your mind, in the background, among the constituents of every beautiful thing coming to you, you know it very well there are these two incredible people, no matter if they’re far away, who constantly deliver prayers and blessings for your well being and form the strings of the music of your life.

Gaze at first expression!

From what you were to what you are now, Life has got changed a lot! Your thoughts, your opinions, your perception, your demeanor, but perhaps you remain the same in a corner of your heart where an innocent, naïve child resides! He still loves to be in that childlike ambience, loves those little pleasures, and enjoys those small things which may be of little significance, but titillating and delightful! He keeps the semblance of innocence alive, more like an obscure beauty, which loses its discernible expression in the inevitable process of gaining maturity. At the same time gets scared of number of things, one of those could be this lovely, but extremely strange thing called Love, love for someone with whom life starts sharing itself, while going through the inevitable journey of pleasures and sorrows! All of a sudden, you start feeling very different unique music and tunes altogether, a symphony of gracious emotions, probably as a prelude to something that you have never felt before! It’s complicated! First expression quite unfathomable!
In the process of growing up, we undergo various transformations in our body, heart and mind. We get the ability to become more aware of things around us; we are more exposed to subtle effects and mind gets conditioned depending on the way we opt to learn. Heart turns more heedful to emotional adherences and sooner or later, we find ourselves on the journey, in the quest of attaining happiness, which has a very important component called Emotional health. Actually a time comes when we feel the subtleness of these transformations more than how we ever felt before. There comes the necessity of having someone very close to you, the desire to have someone with whom you can talk about things, which you have started talking to yourself only. As it is said that for your well being, it’s important to have someone whom you can share your passions with!
You are in the process of discernment. It’s natural and you tend to perceive it more clearly if you are spending some time in introspection, allowing yourself to focus on cognitive processes this heart and mind going through! Above all, it’s so lovely and fascinating indeed! You set your mind to it and there you know what I am talking about, more if you have celebrated “Silver Jubilee” of your life, not long ago! ;-)

Mother's Day

Mother, the holy medium between the Almighty and human manifestation - a sacred truth, expressing immense greatness of being a woman, who experiences one of the most beautiful and proud moments of her life when she embraces the novelist form of life, the very first time; The moment when she needs not any testimony of HIS existence! The instant when she feels HIM more closely than anyone else, narrating the sole truth of human existence when nothing but unlimited Ocean of love and affection has its meaning! A moment when the nine month long conversation between mother and her child, still unfathomable for others, starts getting heard a loud and creates an ambience, witnessing the inception of a new life…something, that can never be portrayed in words – The birth of motherhood, a bliss bestowed to femininity.

It’s mother’s day. One always runs out of words to define the greatness of a mother. It’s just that special feeling, which a mother has for her child, and the child owes it for life!

Being so far and away from my Dear mother, I miss her every moment the way a son would do, the comfort of her lap when you return home frustrated from everyday struggles of life and the confidence she imparts when she says with glittering innocence in her words, “My son can do everything!” Every expression with serene tranquility on her face would tell you again and again that you can do it, everything would be fine!

Despite being miles away, her magic is still there, but devoid of her physical presence and as I am so far, surrounded by lots of uncertainties, number of precarious feelings, her presence in heart always makes things metamorphosed to resolutions from the most complicated situations. And of course, whenever I am able to overcome any problem, or come out of any uneasy state, Heart knows someone is there, constantly delivering prayers and blessings every moment for my well-being!

Better to desire what you don’t have, than to have what you never desired!

In this age of busy lives, we hardly get time to be cordial to the dynamics beneath our surface static, to listen to our body and mind and somehow if we get it, we often find it complaining. However it always remains there in our subconscious mind that perhaps we want to do something, which is important as well as desirable and we want to divert our attention towards it, but eventually it leads to procrastination as a result of lack in mind-body communication. And life keeps going on juggling with the flotsams of everyday life. And in this process, we tend to do few unintended compromises.

I would like to comment on the way we make our choices and negative subsequent effects of them because of the absence of continuous introspection. It’s true we don’t have control over everything what happens, but we surely do exert a field of influence for having the power of choice. So it becomes important to be aware of these choices and make them consciously based on our understanding and belief. And when it comes to the choices we make in case of relationships, their consequences can really be vital. It actually happens quite often that people sometimes even admit to settling for someone who is not really what they wanted, but they think at least they are not alone or no longer left in solitary isolation. It probably works as an immediate fix, but unfortunately may not last long.

It actually gets defined by the set points of our personality. Our set points always drag us towards what we want, what we really have desire for! So be aware of yourself, reflect upon your choices, and give yourself enough time and space to think about what you really want, instead of grappling with the aftermath of doing things, which you never desired. But again is it possible that you can always get what you want? Obviously not, but at the same time it’s true that in spite of fear of the consequences associated with even a well thought-out choice, particularly of this kind where you can only be confident up to a certain extent, and are surrounded by anticipations of future, you would always find easier to live with this situation than the one which you feel compromised in!  We certainly find ourselves circumscribed by thoughts like “What would be HIS choice! What extent I could be part of it!” even as there is nothing wrong in believing yourself stumble one day upon the one who could fathom your soul! So let your higher self be the ultimate guide and make sure you remain conscious during the course of this journey of discernment and let it meander through the states it desires to, let God help you to decide and believe who the special one is and I really wish you all find your soul-mates some day, if you haven’t found yet! :)